30 September 2015

Maze Runner: Scorch Trials

Just under a year ago, I watched the first Maze Runner, and it led me to go on a self imposed hiatus. Because dear me was it a below average film.
So, of course as soon as the second one came out I rushed to watch it.
And was just as quickly disappointed with it.

We meet Thomas again, who is not out of the maze but life is not through punishing him just yet. He and his merry band of survivors are now under protection from WCKD and are 'safe'. They meet several other survivors of other mazes in this new facility, which tends to resemble a fancy Norwegian prison. 
But they have showers and macbooks, so it's okay. 

 After this, what happens, I think other than the director and the only the author would be explain to me because I watched it like,

Dazed and Confused, anyone?

More so than anything, this movie left me with so many more questions. I was assured that in this sequel the questions I had from the first one would be explained. Did they do that? I'm sure they tried. But it wasn't very successful.

People die, paltry conversations with hidden meanings take place and severe teenage love issues exist. I am, to this day not entirely sure what exactly is the relationship between Thomas and Teresa. Are they old friends? Lovers? Siblings? I need some DTR, now.
Also, there are so many people who are all allying and just as quickly betraying sides, it is extremely hard to keep track of. 
All I got was that there is The Flare which zombifies humans making them into Cranks. These Cranks can only be saved by blood from an Immune, which I believe is Thomas. This Immune can only be born and not manufactured. 
And there is the fight with WCKD, but I am not sure why the fight is there. Or why they were put in the Maze to begin with. And how none of the authority figures have realised that reverse psychology works really well with Thomas. 
"You'll never survive in the Scorch."
"Guys, we need to go into the Scorch."
Common people, Thomas is being far too textbook. 
And then we have Newt. Why was he there? I am not too sure. He said an overall of 5 words and most of those was said in a thick, heavily mumbled British accent. 
If he isn't playing a kid in love with a classmate then I find that I just cannot bring myself to care for him. 
The animation is outstanding and really looks real. The direction was a good attempt and now could you please just not make another movie? Because I feel like I can't bring myself to watch yet another one of these. 

The Good: It's run time isn't that long. If you are like me and watch it in fast forward. 
The Bad: There is almost definitely going to be a third movie. 
Run Minho! Away from the filming of the third movie.

28 September 2015


With the start of it's second season in the offing, it's about time to talk about the show that introduced me to Bradley James a.k.a the man who will almost definitely become the father of my children.
 Despite the fact that he has two first names as his legit name, which as a rule makes me not trust person (weird tick, I realise) he is still spectacular enough for me to ignore that.

Speaking as a person who was born into the iGeneration, and hence, as the owner of a an iPad, iPhone and a Macbook (Damn, ruined the stream, didn't they?)
Which of course, meant that I had to do this:
iZombie, for you Android lovers out there, has nothing to do with Steve Jobs and his creations, but instead has everything to do with new age zombies. 
And not to sound like an aged individual but, I sure am super glad that the Vampire phase of these kids is over. 
I am not a big fan of Zombies either, to be fair. But my, oh my, is this show worth watching.
We follow around Liv, a once promising medical student who has joined the army of the undead. 
She solves crime all while pretending that she is 'alive' and 'well'.
How does she solve crimes? She eats the brains of the victims who end up at the morgue, takes on their personality traits and even relives some of their memories. 
The characters are so well thought out, but that credit goes to the original comic book creators, Chris Roberson and Michael Allred. 
The story has been developing rapidly, and it is engaging beyond belief. I am a crime show lover. I mean, holla at Castle, y'all!
But there are so many layers to the story that you have no option but to watch the next episode.
The show doesn't talk to it's audience, it doesn't pander to the sex-starved public and really does justice to the comic book.
On a side note, the theme song from the opening credits is ridiculously fantastic.

The Good: A fabulously multi-ethnic cast that you can't help but love.
The Bad: Bradley James is only a guest star.

26 September 2015

#ScoreSaturday: True Blood

Last year we saw the last season of True Blood. Don't you dare go lying like that to me! You not only watched it, but cried like the "Leave Britney Alone" guy when Bill finally died. And Sookie walked away crying from his grave.

I was never really a fan, of the books or the series. 
Even though it was well made, the characters so creatively and uniquely created and good god, they set out with a solid premise of needing to test people's faith in religion. Which is all up in my jam. Nevertheless, it somehow was never really a part of my weekly viewing diet. Something perhaps to do with the fact that they just mumbled everything! Or the fact that when I hear Sookie, I think Melissa McCarthy from Gilmore Girls and not Anna Paquin.
Who knows?

I did, however, in the light of a fair trial watch almost all of the first season. Which was all about Sookie and Bill meeting and loving one another. And the fact that those two are now married in real life makes me believe that if I was to ever act in a movie with Hugh Jackman he would have no option other than to marry me. And we'd live happily ever after. *Sigh*
Anywho, we watch them be all cute and what cute scene would be complete without the perfect piece of music?
Nathan Barr comes to mind, when discussing this! And boy this piece, with it classical instruments, dark intonations and the goosebumps that inevitably follow it, is far too short for my taste.
All those in favour of asking Nathan Barr to release an extended version of Hairclip, say aye!

While I may not worship at the altar of True Blood, this scene is by far one of my faves. Plus, its a dialogue that I have used upon occasion. 

19 September 2015

#ScoreSaturday: The Middle

Sue Sue Heck is my own personal spirit animal. 

I wonder why I relate to her so much.
When Sue gets a win, I get a win. It is alarming how much I care about a television show character. 
If you happened to watch any of the last season of The Middle, then you would have seen how Sue has had to deal with plethora of love life issues, what with Darren asking her to move in, and then proposing. 
Cut to prom. Sue Heck's proms have always been a sad girl's dream come true. Especially when she did the homage to Pretty in Pink. 
The last prom featured Abercrombie and Fitch boy and a mustardtastrophe. 

And a dress that I personally would have loved to wear. In a delightful plot twist, it turns out that A&F Boy has secretly been crushing on Sue form afar and they dance in the middle of the food court. Now if that isn't a story to tell your grandkids one day, then I don't know what is. 

This beautiful moment was scored by Spencer's 'You are Mine'. 

15 September 2015

Welcome Back

This movie has now ensured that I can no longer get the 'No Regrets' tattoo across my back.

I feel little to no shame in declaring that I saw Welcome. I feel more shame in saying that I saw it more than once.
But I thought that that part of my life was over. Unfortunately as soon as I came home, my parents insisted that we watch a movie as per family bonding rules and the only option was Welcome Back.
My only fault is that I can't explain the story of this movie for the life of me. Not because I wasn't paying attention, or because I was feigning sleep under the guise of jet lag, but because it is as convoluted as possible.
I shall still try, though.
So, Nana Patekar and Anil Kapoor are both attempting to reform their gunda ways and leading good albeit extravagant lives. As showcased by the fact that they apparently own their own massive hotel in Dubai.
They then meet a girl named Chandini, who is a princess with Dimple Kapadia as a mother. They both fall head over guns in love with Chandini. Because who doesn't love skinny girls who refuse to wear weather appropriate clothes?
But plot twist! Chandini and Dimple are con artists who are faking their royal status to get money out of Nana and Anil.
I do see some merit in this plan, 'Hello, I wear teeny clothes and lure you into my woman cave. Can I has some moneez, please?'
Both men, who by the way look older than her father then want to marry her, but seeing as Chandini is barely legal and oh, is lying to them, pretends that she will only get married when Nana's sister gets married.
What sister, you say? So it turns out that Nana Patekar has yet another half-sister, Shruti Hassan who looks absolutely nothing like him and requires him to marry her off to a good guy. Now why does that sound familiar?

If it worked once before, why shouldn't we try the same story all over again, right?

But the reformed gunda's want a good non-gunda to marry their slightly related sister. Where to find this?
Cut to: Paresh Rawal attempting to kill his wife because she got knocked up and had a kid before they were married and hiding it from her husband. To be fair, if she knew he was going to react like that, then she was wise to hide it. She somehow feeds him this bullshit story of how Paresh gets a ready made son where he has had none before and he should be happy. And happy he is, until he is informed by Nana and Anil that the new found son has to marry their sister. 
The son is John Abraham who can show off his 8 pack all he wants, but that isn't going to distract us from his truly terrible acting. 

Add to the terrible acting, a wardrobe which looks as though it has been solely pilfered from a clowns closet, John is doing a shameless job of dressing. 
John is btw, also a gunda. But while Paresh might forgive that, he can't forgive Anil and Nana for not being as reformed as they claim to be. 
He sets up a hilariously inane plan to stop the wedding, while back in India, John and Shruti meet in dubious circumstances, and fall in love and then proceed to do the oddest dance in the history of Bollywood. 

After this point, I well and truly got confused in following the plot lines of the story. The movie is not funny, it isn't anything really.
I sort of watched it expressionlessly. Other than the parts where Nana and Anil attempted to romance with the child actress. Dude, like seriously, she is younger than your daughter is. #MiniVomit
There is a LOT of velour/velvet in this movie. Which is makes me think that all gundas in Asia must be garbed solely in velvet. 
Not to mention that Shruti Hassan attempts throughout to show John to be something he isn't. Am I wrong or is that the complete opposite of unconditional love?
Kindly sit at home instead of watching this abomination that we have to fall a movie. 

The Good: Shruti Hassan refuses to bother with this whole malarkey of acting. Instead she simply saves us from having to deal with that by narrating the script.
The Bad: I paid money to watch this film. 
The Tip: Shruti has shown me that you can wear completely jet black hair extensions under honey-ish colored hair. 
The Oddity: There is a very long scene set in the hotel lobby and while the scene is wrought with emotions but all I could focus on was the fact that the lobby was CGI'd. Why? I honestly cannot say. 

The Deal With: Steve Jobs trailer

Jobs was a film that came out a few years ago and seriously scarred everyone. Now not only have I seriously lost faith in Ashton Kutcher, despite how similar he looked to Jobs himself, but I am extremely cautious of the new film too.
Having said that of course, I watched the trailer. Several times. Not to pay attention to the trailer itself, but for the silent sound of the background music.
Not really silent, but you know what I mean.
I heard the first few thumps in the trailer, and it sounded alarmingly familiar. So I watched again. And still couldn't put my finger on it.
And then, in a brainwave at 3 in the morning, while I was sound asleep, but my poor ADHD addled brain was in hyper drive. And finally I knew what the song was.

I first heard the guys from 2Cellos perform in Glee. I know what you are thinking, how can I give any sort of credit to anything from Glee? But believe me, they were incredible. They were the stars of the Michel Jackson episode where Naya Rivera and Grant Gustin sing 'Smooth Criminal'. 

The guys from 2Cellos are hilarious, please watch their interviews. They are supremely talented and dear god, am I in awe of them. I have always maintained that I love cellists, and they are not free from my love. 
Their Thunderstruck video is fantastic, but their cover of 'Wake Me Up' has the best video which warms up the cockles of my heart every damn time. 

5 September 2015

#ScoreSaturday: San Andreas+Zero Dark Thirty

What do a movie about a massive earthquake and a movie about capturing Bin Laden have in common?
An amazing soundtrack!

The trailer for Zero Dark Thirty played practically on a constant loop before its premiere, especially in every single of those nefarious ads on YouTube.

Other than how cool Jessica Chastain looked, the only thing that I could notice was the incredible music that played in the background.
After the 30th time of rewatching the trailer, I realised that the song was in fact Metallica's Nothing Else Matters. 
A hauntingly beautiful version of it.
And thus I was introduced into the fantastic world of Scala and Kolacny Brothers.

One major motion picture wasn't enough for this incredible group of choir style singers who perform these heart-achingly glorious pieces of music. Which on occasion, I have found to be better than the original version. 
The San Andreas trailer also boasts a Scala and Kolacny piece, California Dreamin'.

For several months, even after the release of the movie, the soundtrack of the film showed The Mama's and The Papas version as the one used in the film. Which is decidedly not the same one. Believe me, in my search for the song, I listened to The Mamas and The Papas version of it several times. 
Instead, the chilling rendition that Scala and Kolacny have done earns some merit now. 

The group has done several more wonderful covers with some rather interesting results. They recently went on tour as well and very carefully avoided coming to the town where I reside. Despite that infraction, I so adore their music. 

2 September 2015

The Deal With: Wildest Dreams

If it hasn't become glaringly obvious yet, I live on the internet. I am like a creature that emerged from the depths of the ocean and is attempting very hard to fit in with humans, so it spends all it's time gaining information on pop cultural references. I'll let you know when I become successful at it.

So, Taylor Swift came out with a new song, along with an incredibly talked about music video.
Now personally, when Tay-tay took her slight foray away from lovey-dovey songs, I did say the words, "She needs to break up with someone. Fast."
While my words had little to no effect, at least Taylor went back to what she does well. Write songs that make sense when you are in love.
Though, given the choice, I might have to pick Megan Davies's version of Bad Blood over Taylor's.

For people who know me, they also know that I am pretty ambivalent when it comes to Taylor. Both Swift and Lautner. Well, that's a lie. Lautner doesn't even come up on my radar. 
So, it might be a shock to some people when I decide to become Tay-tay's champion. 

Wildest Dreams has been under a bit of fire ever since it's release. Among some of the fire it is receiving, is claims of racism.
Along with that, some people have taken quite actively to say things like, "Taylor has a platform and should be doing good with it, instead of making out with pretty boys on screen".
While that sounds like something I might say, this happens to be quoted from another blogger.
First of, some of the complaints seem to be that while she went to Africa to film a music video, she only has famous white people in the video in question.
If you are one of those people who are living under a rock and haven't seen the video, it is a love story between two actors set in the 1930's-40's.
And while the 40's weren't the hay-day of colonization, it was still smack dab in the middle of it. And what was the one thing that we learnt happened in colonial times? Non-white people were only to be seen and not heard and also, not seen.
So, don't hate on Taylor for sticking to historical accuracy in her video. I wasn't alive during the colonial times (Thank goodness for that) but I have read enough about it. Yay, for the Indian Education System!
And if instead of Scott Eastwood if she fell in love with Idris Elba, would that soothe the rustled feathers? *It would deny you Scott Eastwood screen time.
And as for the selfishness in working towards her career thing. Well, for one thing, it's called ambition. She's a person in her twenties attempting to make a name for herself.
Speaking as a person in her twenties attempting to make a name for herself, I commend her success at it.
Think of it this way, if someone gave you the opportunity to film all of the SFW fantasies that you have, would you say no? Because I sure wouldn't.
One of mine would definitely be set in colonial times, where I was an Indian slave girl and Hugh Jackman was a duke who falls in love with me and all of my charming exoticness, but societal issues keep us apart. Someone needs to make this into a movie, now.
And that's what Taylor has done. Take a look at all of her videos and you'll recognize that. She's even done the whole, "Best friends who secretly love each other voice their feelings" and threw in the "Jock chooses nerd over cheerleader" which, as anyone who was raised in the 90's secretly wants. Along with wanting to fall in love with someone you have to write an article about for work. How to lose a guy in 10 days and Never been kissed come to mind.
Also, the ever popular, love after some sort of dare/bet is placed: She's all that, She's the man, Whatever it takes.
So, that's what she is doing. Fulfilling her Wildest Dreams. Good god, am I clever for thinking that up.
And as for the whole doing good in the world thing? Come on, she's 25. Not everyone is Oprah, for crying out loud.
And we can all admit that she is far less despicable than a certain reprobate musician who's name starts with a J and ends with an Ustin Bieber.
Let her get her romanticized notions out of her system and by the time she gets to her 40's we can scold her for her lack of do-goodness.

For now, lets just keep watching her music videos, and pray for the day Scott Eastwood lets me absorb some of his beauty.